User blog:TurtleShroom/Bugzy Facts

Most of you have probably heard of Chuck Norris Jokes, which are actually "Chuck Norris Facts".

I must now share with you "facts" about someone who may be as great as Chuck Norris.

You know him, you fear him, and he kicks butt in court.

That's right, I'm talking about the one, the only, Bugzy.


 * Bugzy sees through the fifth wall.


 * Bugzy is a Master of the Universe. His job is to make sure everyone thinks he is awesome.


 * Bugzy once robbed the Pizza Parlor blind. He then took off his blindfold and enjoyed a delicious pizza.


 * Bugzy once sued the pants off of a complainer. You can find these pants in the Deletion Void. They are all that is left of the plaintiff.


 * Bugzy's hat can slice through diamond and still not wrinkle.


 * Bugzy's power level is over nine thousand. Cubed.


 * Franky the Squealer got away because Bugzy wanted someone to use the Dance of a Thousand Spankings on. He has yet to recieve his punishment because Bugzy has better things to do.


 * Bugzy once stared at the glass casing of a jewelry display. The glass broke and he stole the gems.


 * Bugzy stared at Weegee.


 * Bugzy went to jail because he needed a vacation. If he wanted to escape the AIA, he could have lifted his right appendage and he would have won.


 * Bugzy once defeated King Triskelle in a swimming contest.


 * Bugzy once suplexed the air, just to demonstrate his move. He tore a hole in the space time continuium, thereby allowing the Bureau of Fiction to enter the Fourth Wall. Bugzy now charges the Bureau rent for using his space.


 * Bugzy can not be a Saint. This is because the green circle around a Saint's head in their icon represents PWNage. If Bugzy ever recieved Sainthood, his icon would have to accomodate all of the PWNage that he has. Therefore, the circle and the portrait would have to be collosal. Not only do the Governance and Keith lack enough green paint to depict such PWNage, the picture would be so big, that the earth and its moon would start orbiting around it, making the icon of Bugzy the third planet from the sun. However, the world already revolves around Bugzy anyway, so there is no need to do it again.


 * Bugzy drew Illustrator Keith, approved Benny, and created DJ X's voice.


 * Mayor McFlapp speaks like he does because Bugzy once suplexed him in the throat, damaging his vocal cords.


 * Bugzy once found himself behind Tsar MobileShroom I's vehicle. Bugzy simply stepped on the gas and phased through MobileShroom, as if he was not there. This is because Bugzy's car is beyond MobileShroom's mortal powers and exostance.


 * Bugzy once suplexed a beautiful mountain because he stubbed his toe on a rock. Hence, the OH NOEZ SCAR.


 * Bugzy can deliver mail without the Itinerod.


 * Triskelle didn't cause Whoot to surrender in his bunker by singing. Bugzy simply walked up and stamped on the ground above the bunker. Whoot surrendered immediantly.


 * Bugzy one flicked Explorer's hat. The proppellor spun so fast that Explorer travelled beyond the speed of light, and he disappeared in a time warp. The Explorer you actually see is a doppleganger.


 * Bugzy can perform work with 100% effiency, and PWNage with 110% effency.


 * Bugzy never gives 110% when trying. He gives 111%.


 * Bugzy once met Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris thought he was looking in a mirror.


 * Bugzy once met Captain Str00del. That is why he is a ghost.


 * Communist Poker Face did not defeat Bugzy in poker. However, Bugzy walked into the Bureau of Fiction and changed it so that she won, because he thought she deserved the spotlight for a few seconds.


 * Bugzy once fried some bacon outdoors and spilled some grease. The rock the grease hit became the Amulet of Fire.


 * Bugzy once sneezed on a rock. This rock is now known as the Amulet of Water.


 * One time, Bugzy ate too many burritos. Being a beetle of dignity, he went behind a cliff to flatulate. The rock that was exposed to this is now known as the Amulet of Air.


 * Bugzy doesn't believe in hitting women. Mabel owes her life to this.


 * Look up PWN in the dictionary. If Bugzy is not in it, then the dictionary writers better add it, lest they get suplexed.

 -- † This is Serious Business! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! †    :)  :) Oooh, Yertle is performing his signature Bible Bashing Move! † 18:32, October 25, 2009 (UTC) 

= Additional facts = Copied verbatim from Wikia's blog comments.

*     Sheepman

Bugzy has such a good poker face, he won the 1985 poker world championships, despite that fact that in his hand was a two, a joker, a "Get out of jail free card" and some monopoly money. August 28 by Sheepman Reply

--

*     EternalMagma

Bugzy made Gordon Freeman talk.

Bugzy broke a rocket launcher.

Bugzy defeated the enemy and the friendlies.

Bugzy has over nine thousand lives.

Bugzy eats water and drinks food. August 28 by EternalMagma Reply

---

*     Akbaboy

Bugzy put sunblock but lesser than before on a rock and that rock turned into the Amulet of Aether. July 24 by Akbaboy Reply

---

*     Explorer 767

@ Bugzy saw this blog post, and his ego created a solar eclipse.

And subsequently collapsed into a singularity that traveled back in time.

Ergo, the supermassive black hole at the center of the galaxy. July 23 by Explorer 767 Reply

*     Akbaboy

When an IP sees Bugzy, they explode cuz IPs are too non-PWNsome for Bugzy. July 23 by Akbaboy Reply

-

*     Akbaboy

Bugzy is the reason why a winner is you.

Bugzy can beat Weegee in a staring contest without turning into a Weegee.

Bugzy ate a quadrillion X-virus burgers and still didn't turn into his antibody. June 3, 2010 by Akbaboy Reply

-

*     Zapwire

it was originally vin diesel facts, but for some reason, the chuck norris version became more popular.

Chuck was known for being pretty cool in movies May 29, 2010 by Zapwire Reply

*     Alex001

I know Chuck, but what is he doing that makes him so famous?!? May 29, 2010 by Alex001 Reply

-

*     Sanchonachos

I always though Chuck Norris was some wrestler.. May 29, 2010 by Sanchonachos Reply

*     Explorer 767

BTW, did you know that Chuck Norris is Christian? May 29, 2010 by Explorer 767 Reply

--

*     Explorer 767

Bugzy is the reason i doesn't exist. May 29, 2010 by Explorer 767 Reply

--

*     Corai

o Bugzy is so awsome, hes a Bugzy Sue. May 5, 2010 by Corai Reply

-

*     TurtleShroom

o Bugzy is the reason why WhereIsWalrus is hiding. o Bugzy is more PWNsome than you. o Penghis Khan once watched Bugzy suplex and PWN a shopkeeper who failed to pay protection. That night, he hid in his palace and cried.

--† TurtleShroom™! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! † :)  :) Have your cathedrals got the buttress? † 16:47, May 5, 2010 (UTC)

May 5, 2010 by TurtleShroom Reply

*     TurtleShroom

o Bugzy gave Salina her powers. o Bugzy walked up to Fred and ordered pie. He got it. o Bugzy haunts Nightmare's nightmares. o The Bugzy article is actually the first article made on this website. That is because before Bugzy, this site didn't exist. o Nightmare once saw Bugzy shake down a place for failing to collect protection. That night he weeped bitterly, as no evil plan of his could ever beat that. o Nightmare didn't maim Kill in the Nightmare Epic. Kill happned to look at Bugzy for too long, hence, her horrible state in the story. o Bugzy fought the King of Sorrow and won.

--† TurtleShroom™! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! † :)  :) Hey George... ...you forgot Halliburton. † 17:46, April 28, 2010 (UTC)

April 28, 2010 by TurtleShroom Reply

---

*     Bugzy

Bugzy saw this blog post, and his ego created a solar eclipse.

Feels good man. March 16, 2010 by Bugzy Reply

---

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy's a bigger expert.

Bugzy fired his lazer and then ate the lazer and then ate the fire.

And over 9000 emoticons came out of his butt. February 9, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

*     12yz12ab

o Bugzy will fire his lazer at you. o Bugzy's power level is OVER 9000!

Im an expert when it comes to internet memes. January 25, 2010 by 12yz12ab Reply history

-

*     Sanchonachos

When Bugzy was young, his action figures were short penguins! January 25, 2010 by Sanchonachos Reply

--

*     Corai

Lawlz January 25, 2010 by Corai Reply

---

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy eats Chi Con, Chi Cken, and Corai II, who isn't born yet. January 25, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply history

--

*     Corai

Bugzy eats Mectrixctic

Bugzy eats jerks

Bugzy eats JO MAMMA

January 25, 2010 by Corai Reply history

-

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy round house kicked Chuck Norris January 25, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

*     Corai

o Dracula tried to suck Bugzys blood, Bugzy asked hm if he would like tea instea,d he poisoned the vampire with bugzy blood tea. January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

*     Sanchonachos

o When Bugzy sings, it's over for everybody o When Bugzy plays the Clarinet, he uses wooden floorboards. o Bugzy uses buses for rollerskates o Bugzy has PASA satellites orbiting him. o Bugzy uses two cruise ships for water skiing

---

*     Corai

If bugzy died, the universe would explode. January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

-

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy once spilled sunblock on a rock. It became th Amulet of Shadow.

Bugzy ate Opacus and three trees afterwards. January 24, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

-

*     Corai

Zenny tried to revert Bugzy's existant, his typewritter exploded.

Bugzy fears one thing, that his awsumness will cause people to riot. January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

*     Mectrixctic

Lawlz! January 24, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

---

*     Corai

^

0_________________________________________________0         January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

--

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy eats YOUR MOM!

Bugzy eats Chi Con shodiers

Bugzy eats poop. After he does, food comes out of his butt. January 24, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply history

---

*     Corai

Bugzy eats universes January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

---

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy pooped on a rock and it became the amulet of Earth January 24, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

-

*     Corai

Bugzy can eat Darktan. January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

---

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy killed Holy Wikia and lived. January 24, 2010 by Mectrixctic Reply

---

*     Corai

Bugzy eats entire planets. January 24, 2010 by Corai Reply

-

*     12yz12ab

Bugsy once fired a lazer out of his mouth while saying "IMA FIRIN MAH LAZER BLAAAAAA" January 24, 2010 by 12yz12ab Reply

*     70.54.6.52

Bugzy was playing Pufflemon.He found a Pufflekarp and told it to use Hyper Beam.It used it! November 27, 2009 by A Wikia contributor Reply

-

*     SamRudi

not as good as the chuck norris ones but really good November 21, 2009 by SamRudi Reply

--

*     Explorer 767

When Bugzy failed his calculus test, he got so mad that he suplexed the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus. When the universe as we know it fell apart as a result, he suplexed it again just to set things right. November 21, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply

---

*     Explorer 767

I know, but Bugzy got the Diety Clearance just to flaunt PWNage. November 13, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply

--

*     70.54.5.235

Also my last post also has a Chuck norris joke i mean fact(darn!)

Chuck norris is so scary has a third fist under his bread.

LOL my friend is a PRO at Chuck norris jokes November 13, 2009 by A Wikia contributor Reply

-

*     74.15.76.23

Buzzy has a thrid claw under his bread.Wait he doesnt have a bread November 8, 2009 by A Wikia contributor Reply

--

*     74.15.76.23

Buzzy can eat a cookie. November 8, 2009 by A Wikia contributor Reply

*     TurtleShroom

Explorer, Bugzy doesn't need pansy Diety Clearence. Bugzy has Bugzy Clearence.

--† This is Serious Business! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! † :)  :) Oooh, Yertle is performing his signature Bible Bashing Move! † 12:06, November 8, 2009 (UTC)

November 8, 2009 by TurtleShroom Reply

*     Tails6000

Bugzy went to mcdoodles and ordered a popper, and he got it! October 28, 2009 by Tails6000 Reply

-

*     Happyface414

Bugzy failed a quiz. After that, he suplexed the current rules of spelling, math, physics, english, time, space, science, and everything else. He then re-invented everything in his image. October 27, 2009 by Happyface414 Reply

---

*     Explorer 767

Bugzy once stared at the Classification Code. He was granted Diety Clearance a nanosecond later. October 26, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply history

*     Explorer 767

Bugzy once suplexed a county water tower in Eastshield, causing a major deluge in the Trans-Antarctic Mountains. The remains are the HappyFace Creek Cliffs. October 25, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply

---

*     Explorer 767

That's not wholly correct, TS, I hear the majority of those bits have formed the asteroid belt. October 25, 2009 by Explorer 767

Prev123

--

*     TurtleShroom

I edited HF's comment, the joke was incorrect. By the way, good job, everyone. You seem to understand Bugzy.

Bugzy, angered by Slater, suplexed Slater's stone castle. While suplexing it, he jumped so high that the castle broke outside the earth's atmosphere. The castle bits drifted away and are know known as the Rings of Saturn.

Bugzy aced his math test by writing PWN for each answer. The test was multiple choice. October 25, 2009 by TurtleShroom Reply

-

*     Happyface414

And a Chuck Norris joke:

Jesus walked on water; Chuck Norris swam on land. October 25, 2009 by Happyface414 Reply history

*     Happyface414

Bugzy doesn't read a book to get information, he stares at the book until he GETS the information.

If you have five pebbles, and Bugzy is broke, Bugzy has more money than you.

Bugzy's eyeball is accepted currency everywhere.

Bugzy drank ditto and survived. You drank ditto and became paralyzed.

Bugzy doesn't do homework, the homework does itself.

Bugzy once sent a birthday card to Mabel on September 4. Mabel was too scared to say it wasn't her birthday. From that day on, Sept 4 was Mabel's birthday.

Bugzy counted to infinite. Twice. October 25, 2009 by Happyface414 Reply

--

*     Dancing Penguin

Bugzy > Chuck Norris October 25, 2009 by Dancing Penguin Reply

--

*     Explorer 767

In real life, Uranus and Neptune in fact contain large amounts of methane, which gives the planets their distinct blue-ish color. Cool, huh? October 25, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply

*     Explorer 767

Bugzy, during a visit to Ternville, accidentally flatulated while visiting the Eastshieldian Museum of Meteorology. Not only was the museum's roof blown off, but the gas released zoomed out of the earth's atmosphere at 9,000 times escape velocity and formed the four gas giants. October 25, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply --

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy used a web to catch arachnid boy

Bugzy beats Swiss ninja at everything except Mary-Sue-ish ness

Bugzy doesn't take being parodied nicely. He's the reason why Uglzy has bloodshot eyes. October 25, 2009 by Mectrixctic Reply history

*     Mectrixctic

Bugzy fell into the ocean and died of drowning. 3 times. October 25, 2009 by Mectrixctic Reply

=--

*     Explorer 767

Bugzy was my inspiration to learn logic, actually. I still model my so-called "insolent" logical arguments after his style.

I also preserved the now-deleted Fanon Forum on my mom's computer, because my dad said I should use it as a reference for future debates. October 25, 2009 by Explorer 767 Reply

-

*     TurtleShroom

Write your own Bugzy Facts! Bugzy needs his beak wetted!

--† This is Serious Business! Jesus Loves You and Died for You!! † :)  :) Oooh, Yertle is performing his signature Bible Bashing Move! † 18:34, October 25, 2009 (UTC)

October 25, 2009 by TurtleShroom

